Steven Olivier

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We all know how devastating Mitochondrial Disorders are.  Instead of writing here about how my son fought and suffered throughout his short life, I would instead to write about the happy times and how Steven changed our lives forever.

Steven showed us what the most important thing in the whole world is - to LOVE and be LOVED.

Steven, you never laughed once in your life and yet there was laughter in your eyes.  No matter how much pain or suffering you endured you alway's had a smile on your beautiful face.

I know you suffered, My Baby, and I'm so sorry.  I did my best for you alway's, please know that in your heart.  I feel so blessed by God that He trusted me enough to allow me to take care of you, His SPECIAL LITTLE ANGEL FROM HEAVEN.  I am so proud to be your mommy, I feel honoured that you are my son.  You are the bravest little boy I have ever known in my entire life.

We will meet again in heaven, Son; I guarantee you that.  I get comfort in knowing that you are now running around free and totally healed, and I can even hear your childish laughter as you play with the other children in heaven.  I will never ever forget what you taught me, or what you taught your sisters.  You are in my every thought day in and day out and will be forever.  Thank you for coming into our lives and enriching them, thank you for the joy you brought to us.

Ten minutes before my little son passed away, I leaned over his bed and was giving him kisses and loves and telling him how beautiful he was, and that I loved him so very much.  Little did I know that they were to be my last words to him.

The morning that Steven died, there was a strange calmness about the house.  My daughter picked it up as well and told me weeks later about it.  When the paramedics asked me if they needed to try and revive him, I told them "No, he's at peace now, let him go.  He's had enough.  Leave my son alone."

I picked up my baby son and cradled him for the next hour or so.  It was the most peaceful hour I had spent with him, no choking, no gasping, no struggling.  Angela (my daughter, nineteen years old) then held him and loved him and kissed him goodbye.

My son fought his whole life against the odds.  When others gave up, I vowed to him I never would and promised him I would always do my best to make sure he was comfortable and loved and happy.  Steven taught us the true meaning of the phrase "UNCONDITIONAL LOVE".  Love shone from his eyes and from his soul.

I feel honoured to have had the privilage of looking after Steven, he taught me so much and has changed my whole outlook on life.  We will be together again, My Son, I promise you that.  So, this is not goodbye, it's "So long, until we meet again.

Here is a beautiful true story about how God comforted me after Steven's death.

I was sitting outside one evening, four weeks after my Steven had passed away, the 11th of September, 2000.  It was about nine o'clock in the evening, and I was feeling very sad and longing to hold my baby in my arms.  It was his birthday the very next day, and he would have been seven years old.

As I was looking up to the heavens, tears streaming down my face, I said to God "Do you know, Lord, I remember that every time that I put Steven in the garden, a little butterfly would alway's fly around him and then flutter away.  What are the chances of you sending me a butterfly, just to let me know my son is safe with you?"

Then I laughed at the stupidity of what I'd just said.  I continued, "Lord, how silly of me.  It's 9 PM at night.  When do butterflies fly around at night?  It was a silly request, I'm sorry".  With that I walked inside, drying my eyes.  I went to my computer to send an email to a very special friend of mine, who had helped me through a lot.

As I sat down, Tracey (my youngest daughter, seventeen years old) walked up to me with her hands slightly cupped.  I looked at her and went cold as she opened her hands and the most beautiful WHITE butterfly gently fluttered towards me.  I couldn't believe it, so I sat staring, and then I smiled and said to my daughter "Tracey, do you know what I just asked God for outside?"

"No, Mommy, what did you ask God for?"

I smiled at her and told her my request.  Tracey then said, that as I had walked back inside, she had noticed the white butterfly on the curtains (drapes.)  She brought it to me, as she knows that I love butterflies because of Steven.  But that's only the start, it gets more beautiful.

The butterfly sat on the wall with me for the next three to four hours.  In the morning, the butterfly was still there, fluttering around.  I thanked God for this beautiful sign of His love, and then I opened the doors and windows and said to the butterfly, "You've made me very happy.  I've gotten my sign from God, you're free to fly away now."  But the butterfly didn't leave.  The windows and doors were wide open and the butterfly fluttered around, but it stayed with me.  It was a special gift from God to me.

The very next day, the morning of Steven's birthday, Angela's friend gave me a beautiful potted plant with tiny purple flowers on it, in remembrance of Steven's birthday.  The butterfly gently settled on this plant and stayed there for three days.

On the third day, the buttterfly died.  I gently put him in a little glass box and placed him in the cabinet next to my son's ashes.  Everytime I walk past and see the little butterfly, I feel so comforted.

Till I see you again my baby son...

I will cherish your memories forever.

Mommy
Angela & Tracey (Steven's sisters)